A couple weekends ago, I went with K to a barbecue at one of her coworkers place. It was a gorgeous night to be out in a backyard with grill and I couldn’t resist crashing the party. After falling in love with the resident dog, Ronan, and the architectural details still in place and not gooped up by 100 layers of paint, the host and another guest got on the subject of tarot cards. Our host just happens to read them, so her friend had her read them for her and then she asked if K and I wanted her to read ours. Even though it was just for fun and we were obviously not clearing the room for private readings, I tried to not listen in too much to the first two readings. K thought hers was interesting, and maybe good, some of the things she said were pretty spot on about how things were going. I thought it was pretty interesting because this person just met me an hour or so ago and we had talked briefly about what I do, she didn’t have to much to really go on, but she said somethings that made a lot of sense.
I guess there are multiple ways to do this, but she started by shuffling the deck then giving it to me to cut, shuffle, whatever I wanted to do to them while thinking about a question I wanted to ask. Then I gave the cards back and she laid out the top six cards, four in a row and one above the far left card, and one below the far right card. I know there was something about where the card were that meant something about past, present, and future, and probably something else too, but I don’t remember. My question was: Am I leaving New York soon? The answer, possibilities are high. She said there was a lot of creativity in my cards, that there was opportunities in places I wanted to go. She told me she was getting a very strong, “Eat, Pray, Love” vibe from my cards. That I was looking for inspiration and that I really, I have the ability to create that inspiration and I was trying to figure out what it was that I wanted to do with all my creative energy. I needed to take all my experiences and abilities, and rearrange them until I found what I was looking for. The last thing she said was that I was really craving something hands on, like canning. As for a relationship, I could take it or leave it, it wasn’t something I was really looking for right now.
Again, I hadn’t talked that much to this person and I’m not to sure what one should really believe about these things, but it is pretty interesting. It was probably clear that I like what I do, but I still want it to be something else. And given my antsiness lately with things in general, it’s interesting to have someone say it that way. I probably am looking inspiration or something to get me to take a leap and make a big change that I know is coming. I would love to go on an “Eat, Pray,Love” adventure, I’ve thought that since I read the book over six years ago. As to whether or not that would help me figure stuff out, I don’t know, I’m not really looking for some spiritual guidance, and I have an idea of where and what I want to do, it’s just a matter of how to make it happen. As for the hands on stuff, that she picked canning, it’s really funny because I keep telling my mom that I want to steal her canning stuff so I can use it, but there is no room in New York apartment. Instead I started sewing a dress that I’ve had the pattern cut for since Christmas the next day.
I don’t know if I’m going to read to much into it, or believe that I’m skipping town tomorrow. I think it is crazy how well she may have read my current state of being and maybe spelled out what was going on in my head without me really realizing it. The reason I had asked this question is because at that point in time, I had not yet heard back from from the Rose Fellowship that I applied for in August. It was around the time that I should have been hearing something soon, and even though I knew it was a long shot, I really wanted the fellowship. Unfortunately, I finally heard from them and I didn’t make the cut. So now it’s back to square one on trying to figure out where I am going and why I want to go there. I don’t want to leave New York, to end up doing the exact same thing somewhere else, but jobs with decent pay that are similar to the Rose Fellowship are far and few in between. The current goal is to be out of New York by the end of 2013, which should give me time to finish projects at my current job, check out other cities, and research firms and organizations that work with non-profits or atypical architectural clients. If you have any leads or ideas, let me know, this is not going to be a easy decision, I can use all the help I can get!